7 MONTHS & MARRIED

Oh, the shock on people’s faces when we announced we were engaged after 4 months of being together. Sadly, we had more negativity from some people than we had positivity. Which to be honest was disappointing. It’s funny how people think they need an explanation as to WHY before they accept and encourage.

I have known of Daniel Plested for a while through family and also he went to my primary school (Girls, it just shows your husband could be behind you in the line at the coffee shop tomorrow. You never know. Keep your eyes peeled and when the time is right it will happen). I guess this also means I didn’t only know him for 7months but over 12years 😉 so all ya haters out there bite on that for a second.

I have seen him around but if I am honest he never caught my eye not because he wasn’t awesome but because I was blinded by the wrong things and also it just wasn’t the right time. I was a young mum who was looking to the world for my fulfilment and worth & not my faith…. But we won’t get too much into & leave that story for another blog post.

I bumped into Daniel one night but previous to this night he had added me on Facebook and Instagram and started to chuck a few likes here and there… His tricks worked because it actually got me to become familiar with his name popping up!!! (He was 100% completely, totally stalking me) So when I saw him out it wasn’t weird to say hello. I still remember the hug he gave me. He laughed while he did it as to say “I know exactly who you are” have you guys ever experienced this? I’m sure you know the feeling… it feels awkward but not at the same time. On that note, if you ever see me around the streets and recognise me before I do you please say hi! I’m all for a good chat with real people not just connecting over the big bad internet.

Anyway, after seeing him out we got on the Snapchat bandwagon … I started snapping him but thought nothing of it until I realised I had been talking to this guy non-stop for about 2 weeks! I remember walking into the bathroom at work and looking in the mirror like holy crap I really like this guy. I found myself checking my bloody phone every 2 seconds to see if he had replied… It started to consume my thoughts? Girls, I bet you know what that’s like. Waiting for that guy’s reply sometimes can feel like a lifetime!! Boys maybe your lesson here is to reply faster!! It hit me like a tonne of bricks that I really really think he is the one for me. As I mentioned before I was a single mum trying to take the best care of my son and working full time. So this was something I had to treat with wisdom. I didn’t want just any guy getting to know Houston and then leaving us. I wanted to protect my son as I am so passionate about him knowing what TRUE love is. I want Houston to grow up with the best influence and to know what is done in love is done well.
It’s such a simple and boring story some may say but I actually just met him and knew. I loved the way he was so confident and sure of what he wanted. I love a guy who knows what he wants and is driven in life. Daniel treated me how I had always desired to be treated. He knew my life was way to unique to change & He brought fun and a willingness to do everything to get me. Girls, remember you can court also. We always wait for the guys to do this but why? So old school. I am not a fan of the relationship games and the ‘waiting for him to text me first’ rubbish. If you like someone TELL THEM! Don’t play the games! You will always end up getting hurt because last time I checked people can’t read minds. Text them if you want to text them! Ask them to hang out if you want to hang out!! Be yourself. Don’t sacrifice who you are and your moral standards for ANYONE. I did that too many times and all I can say is that I was the one left behind at the end of the story.

Daniel showed that the games aren’t worth playing. It was more attractive that he was forward and showed me he liked me from the start. He calls me beautiful like it’s my name.
He celebrates every small victory (I think this is the coolest thing! Life can boring otherwise.)

I guess a huge part of Daniel coming into my life includes the part where he meets Huey for the first time. I had been talking to Daniel for a little bit at this point and had gone on a couple of dates rah rah, Then I thought Houston is a huge part of my life and who I am so it’s time they met.
You could think that because it’s all gone swimmingly well thus far this part might also & that Daniel and Huey would take one look at each other and run into each other’s arms like it was all meant to be. But it actually took awhile for H to warm up to Dan as he was much younger and super shy. Both Daniel and I had to wipe the expectation of how it ‘should be’ and ‘should look’ and just go with the flow and know that Huey will one day be completely comfortable in front of Daniel and it will just take time and effort like all relationships.

Shortly after this Daniel was cooler than me.

Daniel teaches and spends quality time with Houston at his level. I know Houston will grow up to know how blessed he is to have such a hero in his life.
Daniel is in charge of the morning shifts (so I can sleep in of course) and the baths at night. Without him, Houston & I wouldn’t be the same. I went from doing  everything  myself to sometimes feeling like I don’t do enough to help out!!!!

We have now been married for 7months. It’s been bliss.

Daniel has provided for us including allowing me to stop work so I can spend time with Huey everyday all day. It is something I have only ever dreamt was possible. I had to go back to work full time when Huey was 5months old so I could bring money in and allow H to have everything he needed in life. It’s so crazy, blows my mind and makes me feel so emotional even still when I am writing these words sitting on my kitchen bench while H plays happily with his toys in the background.

I don’t know about you but this proves that it is still possible to have your happily ever after. Even after all the low valleys and the mountains you didn’t think were possible to climb… I promise you it will come. Be patient. Someone will love you for who you are. Baggage and all honey!
We are now living in our second home as we decided to start a family straight away. As you can see from photos on Instagram @abbyplested I have a massive lump growing in front of me. SO this means we grew out of the last house (who grows out of a house in under a year??) We are now starting to fill the new house with extra fingers and toes. We have created some crazy fun memories, including all the arguments we have had. Yes, we argue. I don’t know how couples ever expect to grow if they don’t have conflict. It’s healthy and normal. It plays a massive part in your learning on how to communicate in the right ways with each other. The biggest thing we have learnt is there are NO winners in a marriage (or relationship). Once you learn this you will have no issue saying sorry first. However, it usually just ends in me crying as I’m major pregnant and emotional. I seriously cry every second day. Some days just because I’m hungry and can not understand why we have no Avo in the house for my toast or why my DECAF coffee isn’t kicking in.

This all leads me to the point I am now so passionate about. I don’t believe you need years of history with someone before you can get married because for me it was true. Once you know, you know. Use your head and heart at the same time and you’ll find him or her along with trusting Gods plan for your life. I knew God had a plan and purpose for me even in the middle of my darkest days and when people told me to settle on the wrong guys for what seemed right for them but not for me. I held onto the fact that I’m worthy of Gold and nothing less. Maybe it was also when I realised that there is no perfect person, and I was by far not perfect either and brought my high, unrealistic, Hollywood expectation levels down without compromising on my non-negotiables.
So to shorten the whole thing up a little. The fairy-tale story goes a little like this: we meet fell in love and chose not to fall out of love.
Mostly we just have fun. He’s my best friend. I love every part about him, truly.

A x

 

Our Day 🙂

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20 thoughts on “7 MONTHS & MARRIED

  1. I love this so much! I have such a similar story to yours! My bug boy to another man and now my little man. I will be marrying the love of my life in 4 months! I had also known him for years but hadn’t thought of him in that way until one day I realised what life was all about. Now that we have him I don’t know how I ever coped without him! He is also so driven and is so accomplished he also does the morning shift so I can sleep! My name is either beautiful or gorgeous (to the point where that’s what my son was calling me for a while). I come with a lot of complicated baggage too and it was amazing that God still was able to provide me with such an amazing man! I’m so glad someone else out there has this experience and knows somewhat what it feels like. Please keep sharing I live love these blogs x

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    1. Hi Mandy,

      Wow, thats is so amazing!! you must know the feeling so well…. What a peace it brings right?? Houston actually started calling me Babe for a bit because of Daniel haha! was the cutest thing! What an amazing man your future hubby must be to have you. All the best for the wedding it will be the best day of your life! Enjoy, Enjoy, Enjoy!!!!

      A xxxxxx

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  2. Hi Abby,

    Have very much enjoyed reading your blog. Came across your Instagram page through some lifestyle accounts. I wanted to know if you would share where you purchased your turquoise throw from? It’s gorgeous! Thank you.

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  3. First up- love what you are doing here and the confidence and fun you seem to bring to what you do (noted via instagram). I love hearing the stories of fellow Mamas; we found out I was pregnant after 4 months, with one way tickets to South America in our hands! Fast forward to our girl being 15 months now and the choice to stay in love is something that we only just figured out properly. Could have saved a whole lot of pain and tears had I known this earlier, but all part of the story..
    Look forward to seeing more from you and wishing you all the best for the growing fam x

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    1. Hey beautiful Anna,

      What an adventure you have been on!!!
      Oh my, its a choice every single day thats for sure… I feel you girl! Life can chuck some crazy full on things our way right? The tears and pain grow us! Your character & your family will thank you for being a person who chose to let it grow them. I look forward to you reading my blogs and even getting a tiny bit out of them all the way from South America. xxxx

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      1. Should have mentioned that we bought a ticket back home before she was born and now settled back in Auckland haha but was nice to squeeze one baby free holiday in there!

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  4. Beautiful Abby !! I believe in love no matter how long you have known someone ! My tinder Love where married and pregnant within a year ! now we are about to guid our dream home on waiheke !! Arabella is the best little miracle whom came into our lives !! Love your writing ! Congratulations on the new bump xx

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  5. You are such an inspiration, I truely admire you and all that you stand for! I follow you on Instagram and your blogs and love following you through your journey. We need more positive and real people like you in the world, I love your outlook on love. I have been with my partner for 5 years now and you are right you cannot grow without the arguments and who cares how long you have been together before you get married, if your inlove with someone I say go for it! Keep doing your thing honey you are awesome!

    – Soph xx

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